Away

 I'm sitting in a hotel room in beautiful, sunny California. I'm here doing a job I truly love where I have worked hard for the last 10 years to reach a role that is a perfect fit for me. This is my first solo show as a senior admin. I should be proud, excited, joyous,  . . . something.

Instead I'm sitting awake missing a little boy halfway across the country and wishing I had been there to tuck him into bed. I hugged him goodbye this morning after therapy and lunch. He told me to have a fun trip. I left his freshly charged nightlight by the stairs. I did his laundry, put his meds in the holder, made sure his room was clean, and tried to do everything in my power to make sure he has a great weekend.

He's in good hands. My husband is home with him and my middle daughter has been helping with bedtime this week. i'm not actually worried about his health, his safety, or him having fun. I just miss him. I miss the closeness we shared over the past few weeks spending every minute together. I miss being a part of his daily routine and sharing his minimoments throughout the day. 

I'm sure it's good for him to have a change of pace and have a different primary caregiver for a few days. I know he and my husband will grow closer over this time. I believe that it's good for kids to see their mom pursue a career that she loves. But all the good doesn't erase the longing in my heart and I'm already looking forward to being back home with him. 

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